Somehow, I could have guessed you would be related to Shirley Valentine!
I get scared by the very idea of kids and marriage because of this. Women almost always get the kids and many seem determined to demonize fathers.
I had a friend last year who I was babysitting a lot for. Her son started calling me Dad and I felt really uncomfortable. (She is gay and with a woman but also married to another man now and it’s all a bit messed up.)
She said it was okay, and I would just be “Daddy Andy,” and become one of several ‘Dads’ who are basically male friends of the boys’ mother who he all calls Dad or Uncle. At this point, this little boy who loved robots and dinosaurs was also getting unicorn dolls and what you would consider girly toys for Christmas and his birthday.
I very gently said that telling your kid who seems to be looking for a Dad that anyone is his Dad is just wrong and possibly very dangerous. Straight away I was public enemy number 1. Meanwhile, the real Dad apparently isn’t at all happy that he only sees his kid once or twice a year (due to his mum moving here to Malta.) None of that matters though as apparently he’s just the worst person in the world.
I’m not sure if I believe that…
This is why I’m only marrying a woman who has what you would call ‘traditional’ values. I hate being called misogynist for that but as I see it, if I have traditional family values, I’m hardly going to pursue anyone who doesn’t share them.